Of Everything

There’s a peace
And a sublime surrender
When you’ve chosen the path
The final detour
The final ender

It lifts the heart
And lifts the soul
Because you know the pain
Is about to let go

No one ever knows
About these things
You can’t explain away
You just go away

No explanations
Because I’m so tired
I’m just so tired
And I have no love
I have no life
I have nothing
I have nothing
I have nothing

I lost everything
I lost my life
I lost my love
Of everything

Retail Hell

This is just about my experience in retail. That's all. This is my take on it. But, I always like the fact that it can always go a different way...with poetry.

I ain’t trying to sell
Just trying to liquidate
Introduce a product
For your own sake
It’s gonna make
Life so much better
It’s gonna make you happy
Gonna make you sappy
Little plates
Little cakes
Little tokens of liquidate

I gotta get it for her
I gotta get it for him
I gotta get it for Jesus
It’s a win-win

One for you and two for me
Let’s clink the glasses
And make it three
Oh I’m in love
With the powerful glove
Leather is the trend
Get it before the end
We got it yesterday
Try it on….
It looks so good
On you….

Aint’ trying to sell
But hell
Let’s liquidate

It looks good on you

For them

Waton Life

What do I want in life?
To be happy without a pit in my stomach
To embrace
To love
To forgive
And live and let live
To communicate and not dictate
To love and love and love
A warm blanket on a cold night
To let me know it’s gonna be alright
Even when it’s not
I wish I could be better than I am
I wish other people could to
I want to love
Wanton love - so much it hurts that I can’t
But I do

Once Peace at a Time

I guess I’ve tried to make light of so many things in my life because I’ve had so many heavy things happen, I just tend to blow it off. It doesn’t matter. I don’t have feelings. Or the feelings I have are off the mark. Exaggerated components of emotions I’m trying to place together. A jigsaw puzzle in the mind.

But it comes to a point. And I start to feel. Like when you sleep on your hand and the feeling starts to come back again. The lack of circulation? It was ok to be numb when I was numb to it. But when it starts to tingle…when it starts to feel…that’s where the issues come in.

That’s when the scrambled pieces come together.

I’ll figure it out. I always do.

If I look at it hard enough……I’ll start with the borders and look inside.

One piece at a time
One peace at a time
A jigsaw puzzle in the mind

Good Habits - Bad Behavior

Mama didn’t teach too much about life
She liked to preach…though
About walking five miles in the snow
To get to the church on time
But hell Mom…
This ain’t Idaho

She was born Smackover
In an Arkansas oil patch
Sleazy and Greasy
Never met her match

And didn’t understand about the bird and the bees
When asked….she said
“There ain’t no bees in a man’s pants!
She said a lot of things when she went on rants

She said…..
Girl…..to get your man…
Ya gotta have good habits
But bad behavior
Blessed is our Savior
For Good Habits
And bad behavior

Oh Lord, she said, don’t you know
I can’t tell who's good or bad
At a church social
Or in a Sears catalog
I’ll never have my wish book wishes
Of marriage dishes
And midnight kisses
My life has been a fog

She’s looking for the light
She’s looking for a light
For the next cigarette
Ain't never gonna quit
In the bars or behind the bars

It’s killing me
So I’m gonna pray
For God to release me
From the bonds that torment me

I pray every night to see the light
God, I pray for good habits
But Lord knows I’ve got bad behavior
Blessed be my Savior
Give me good habits
And good behavior
Be my Savior
Of bad habits and bad behavior

A write and a wrong

No one likes to write…everybody likes to wrong

When you’re on the trip….ok....
When you’re walking around….
Absorbing nothing of the natural sounds…..or looks…in a way….
Take a picture…it looks good…on the grassy knoll....a willing mole

You gotta look…it’s by the books….

What did I hear?
Zupriter I fear
A billboard in the wake
A Convenient convertible on a sunny day

A bullet on the gurney
Took quite a journey
So did the pill box hat
On the trunk
Imagine that?
That’s why I love Dallas…

Blood On Air Force One
Let’s get the good One
Profile….that is…
Profiles of Courage?
Gotta look good for the cameras…

No one likes to write…everybody likes to wrong

We proved it
On Air Force One

That's why Yellow Makes Me sad

Spaghetti Bushes
I’ve seen them all

On film
On trees
I’ve seen them drying in the breeze

That’s why
Environment’s on the brink
And that's why yellow makes me sad
I think

Santa Claus is
A little nauseous
I’ve seen him
Picking Spaghetti bushes
Gotta find a new profession
Melting poles/pool reflections

Can we get off the jackwagon
To mamby pamby land?

We can’t afford glad
We’re staring at spaghetti land
Bushes populating the land

And that’s why yellow makes me sad
I think

We are on the brink
Of Melting poles
Cool reflections
And that’s why yellow makes me sad
I think

Goodbye...Or...Good Buy...Either Way..Adios.....

I don’t know
And it doesn’t matter
I’m detached from the world right now
I can’t get thru it
Thru the orbit…..
And it doesn’t matter, anyhow

A pimple
On the forehead
Not a consideration
Just something to get rid of
Something to make fun of
Do what everyone does
Eliminate, Eliminate
Too much to take
It doesn’t matter, somehow
It doesn't matter, anyhow

I’ve seen enough
I’ve done enough
Been through enough
Enough is enough

I’m done
I’m done
It wasn’t won
no winning
It doesn't matter somehow
It doesn't matter anyhow

You''ve Killed Me

You gotta go
It’s in front of your face
You can’t “peace out”
Or have grace
Just cry and blow – Cry and blow
You’ll leave this world without a trace
Or is there….another show?
Is there another race?

You ask questions
But the truth is
You’re already there…….
Hell Yes
Does anybody care?
Hell No
Easily replaced?
Hell yes
Too tired to curse
And what’s worse
You’re already there

Cry it out
Let it go
There’s always
Another rodeo
With a tramp-o-light
Or a tramp-o-lean
Or with a Middle Aged Beauty Queen
Did you get Her?
With the first Swing?
Yeah
I guess ya did....

And now you got Sing Sing

With tramp-o-lights
And tramp-o-leans
And simple things
Called neck strings
That solves most problems
For everything

Just swing and swing
With the Big Bad Band
There's a good Horn Section
In Sing Sing

A Poser Posing Question

What should I do????

Is anyone what they should be?

Superman leaped tall buildings with a single bound

But later found dead with drugs all around

Faster than a speeding bullet - couldn't be found

What should I do

What should I be

Pink crinkled doughnuts

So easy to please

We've lowered the pedestal to an alarming rate

Looking up from the ground....through the grates?

Oh...that's where we live

In the United States

What should I do?

Make it while you can

Who should I be?

Too bad you don't have identity

Throw a ball or throw a race
If you're good.....you've got a chance
Too bad for you
You have no stance

But we love it when you dance
Love it when you dance
We all know about chance
And you have no Stance
In the Dance

Skeet In Wisconsin

I had a friend in college who loved to tell me great stories or lies or something in between. She’s one of those individuals that you keep at a distance. Like, a decades distance or a life’s distance. You never can keep her too close, because she is like the sun. You’ll always get burned. Didn’t anyone ever tell you not to look too close or you’ll go blind? It’s a good warning. It’s just too bad the warning pertains to her - a burning glob of heat that will eventually destroy everything in its site.

She’s got your ticket
You ain’t gonna lick it
In Wisconsin

She gets off the plane
She's got her aim
Gonna hit skeet
Or Kill Someone
In Wisconsin

The gun plucked her arm
As she aimed for the mark
It traveled quite a way
What did she say?
I’ll have Cheese in Cincinnati
Or hit Skeet in Wisconsin

Buy a ticket to either
She’ll call you a liar
She'll see you soon
On a funeral pyre

She calls me up
Tells me her thoughts
About the people in her mind
Remember the one
At the Door?
He’s the one
Left behind?
The one she adores
Hell, she's just a whore
Who’s keeping score
She's got a gun
And shooting someone
Or hitting skeet in Wis-con-sin

There's a Con
There's a Sin
Everyone cons
Everyone sins
In Wisconsin

A ticket to anywhere
A ticket to nowhere

Are you Somebody or Nobody?

Are you Somebody or Nobody?
I’ve met both and all
You’ve gotta blame Somebody for Everything
And let Nobody take the fall

Breezy

It’s easy to be breezy
With an uncomplicated mind
Where there’s nothing unobtainable
And everybody’s kind

And there you have it all the way
Working hard to make the play
Work it hard to make it stay
Work till there’s no parlay

There I wait until the day
Everything goes my way
Until I know
It isn’t so
And everything I know
Is all for show

The hard part is the truth
Which can appear to be aloof
The unspoken thoughts
And unspoken dreams
Culminate into everything

I hurt for loss
It’s under my skin
Everyday. As I am
I leave home
But nightmares stay
I hurt for loss
Of everything. Of everything.

Burn a Koran Day

All Hail the
Burn A Koran Day
It ain’t Namaste
It’s the New Testament Way

Condemn and rejoice
Throw fire on a voice
Mosque at ground zero
Can't be mixed with a hero

We gotta go to Gainesville
And populate the landfill
With the Word of God
Isn’t that Odd?
Thanks to the Beck and call
Finishing Muslims once for all

We don’t need no tolerance
Burning books makes so much sense

Where the hell
Can you buy a Koran?
Are they made in Japan?
Not a thought out plan

Did ya ever think about Kindles?
Silly Christians lighting candles
Who could believe
Hate is the new currency
To stimulate the economy

America A Go-Go

America A-Go-Go

Let’s mourn the passing
of America A-Go-Go
It was a great dance Party
And one hell of a show

Everyone was
On the floor
Wigglin’ and a Shakin’
Their Thangs

You could feel the music
And everybody sang
There was no end in site
Hell, it was outta sight!

Let’s say a how-do-you-do to
Corporate A-Goo-Goo.
We’re dancing alright
but it’s not much fun

Wiggling on forfeitured floors
Shaking that wallet
Watching the oil
As it pours

Oh and look over there
Let’s not forget
To give a big round of applause
To the Government
Government a Boo-Hoo
Who's crying now?

Parties without dancing
Parties without fun
Parties without feelings
Parties on the run

Let’s mourn the passing
of America A-Go-Go
It was a great dance Party
And One Hell of a Show

Give Me a Break

Are you a good witch or a bad witch? In essence, all witches are bad and all breaks are bad. A bad witch walked in front of me while I was riding my bike and I went head over heels into the pavement, breaking my shoulder. She didn’t have striped socks or ruby slippers, but I could see munchkins walking around wondering whether or not I was gonna make it and where the hell was the horse of a different color? The only colors I saw that day were black and blue. I might have been hallucinating. That would explain a lot.

Through the past few years I’ve found myself in the most terrible tosses and turns of life. Tornados? That seems appropriate. Nobody to blame but me. It’s easier to deal with things when you have support. I’m just not that good at asking for it. I’m smart, but I’m not Mensa material. Oh hell… even at Mensa level you can be completely retarded on how to boil water. You know why it boils…you just don’t know where to find the pot.

So why do I sit here feeling stupid? Because I am. We all are at times. However, most of the time I think we are all brilliant. But I’m stupid if I continue to think about the things I would like to change and never having the courage to affect it.

Is there such a thing as a good Break? Can people find redemption and enlightenment from pain? Hum, being splayed out on a busy city street can certainly bring about a different perspective, that’s for sure. Because from that vantage point on that particular day, the only way to go was up.

And of course, there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. There was nothing to hide from. No witch, no munchkins and of course, I wasn’t heading down a yellow brick road. But I am desperately trying to find my way home.

No equations to relations

Percentages and Relativity……

Oh how I hate math. I hate equations and decimals and precise formulas. In a perfect world, everything would work out if you just do the homework…if you can figure out the code. Static. Real. Complex but oh so simple. Such as it is with relationships, right? Meet the right person….and the formula will work. Oh…but I forget about the two negatives making a positive thing. Dang, how I hate math.

There’s no equation to relations. The math is daunting. Over 50% of marriages fail. I’m sorry to say that I’m am part of that statistic. It breaks my heart. That is to say, if I still have one. I hear it pulsing and the rate goes up when I exercise, but the true heart is in the soul, and mine is in severe disrepair.

For people pursuing a relationship, you can always look to the beautiful side, the right brain where nothing goes wrong and the roses never die. It’s a romantic notion spent on a rainy day when you finally decide that the movie version of boy meets girl actually works (a formula plot, by the way). It looks so good on screen. Laughter, tears, sex, make up sex, and basically sex for the sake of having it. What love. What love indeed.

Does this deter me from trying to find happiness in the companionship of others? To trust someone with my heart? Hell yes it does. If they ever figure out Pi….then maybe we can decode the true formula of love and how we can work out the equations to stay together. I have a huge eraser and can correct mistakes. We’ve all made a few even the erasers can’t touch. The paper is too thin and the marks won’t go away.

What was the Einstein theory…Energy is equal to mass x speed of life…ok..speed of light!! Well, the light is bright and I’m speeding through it. Mass…well….I go to the gym on a daily basis to deal with the mass. I’m not sure that’s what Einstein had in mind, but, as I said……I hate math.

They Love the Party - But not the Life

I saw an interesting documentary about a 15 year old boy who always talked about death until talking wasn’t quite enough.

Everybody contemplates death. I mean, why do we have life insurance….for death…of course. Why don’t they call it death insurance??? Business loves death….you could say….they thrive on it…kind of like flies…. actualities …..decomposition.

It made me sad, this documentary. The parents kept turning the camera on to this kid, who clearly had mental issues. Not blaming the parents at all, but why would you continue to shine a light on someone with issues?? Maybe to avoid the eventual blame that they knew was going to happen? The mom actually took a picture of her son hanging himself….simulated hanging. It’s a little sick. They were both film makers. Maybe they always kept him at a lengths distance. I’ll see you through the lens and not through the heart. It’s hard to make sense of mental illness, death, life, reality. Isn’t it all the same? Most of life is insane. I’m surprised that more people don’t jump out of a window. Which in case, this 15 year old kid did.

I think he thought he was going to be part of the after party. He actually wrote a play about the death of a teenager, and how everyone missed him and cried at his funeral. He reminds me of a bridezilla, they love the party, but not the life.

Under the Underneath

Do we REALLY have choices?

When I see the lines getting longer and longer at the Street Missions in Dallas, I think that at least I’m not there…at least I have a car and can drive by them and feel emphathy/sympathy for them and pray that it never happens to me. And then I drive by the homeless under the bridge that don’t even bother standing in line. Have they given up hope for that in lieu of an early death or at least a day of sanctuary…away from the wind, the cold or the unrelenting heat of summer?

There's a guy with no legs in a wheelchair on the coroner’s corner, as I call it.
Is that the same guy as last week? Who knows? When you've seen what I've seen....the folks either disappear, walk away, have a bus route, a wheelchair, or have a motorized scooter with American flags flying in the wind racing on the streets near Fair Park. Some of them will have signs asking for money or food...most will not. There's no clever way to adverstise what they want. But plenty of catch phrases to describe what they are.

And most have no destination at all. Me included. I drive, I observe, I do nothing.

I wish I had a penny to spare. But, pennies cost more to make than what they're worth. I guess you could say that about people, they cost more than what they're worth. Well, especially if they are under the bridge, under the table, under the underneath of life – with American flags flying in the wind.

Truth Always LIES In the Middle

You know, it takes time and effort to build relationships. Acquaintances and associates can turn into lovers and friends over the course of time. I remember a conversation I had with one of my best friends who now is nothing more than a file in my mind, a reference of days long gone. He told me that all the good will a person can build over time can be lost on a dime when you make one false move. One stupid mistake in a plethora of niceties and politeness can result in an irrefutable fall from grace. Once you know someone....at some point....you've got to either pull the plug or drink the Koolaid. Both have deadly ramifications. Both have ambiguous answers.

Do something good - Get Awards & Adulations
Do something bad - Get Accusations & Assassinations

Isn’t that the way we are?

Most of us are happy to congratulate folks for a job well done. By the same token, we are all too happy to dish the trash.

Maybe that’s why I chose not to be successful :)

I don’t want to be an easy target, easily shot down. There’s probably SOME truth to that. But, that’s probably more of an excuse than true reality. Truth always lies in the middle.

Humans are not good people

We populate, pillage and pummel the planet.

We've built and built and built until destruction has become the new construction.

Destruction of the presidency - let's show the world that our chosen leader is completely incompetent.

Destruction of the family - let's make sure that both parents have to work to make ends meet.

Destruction of the economy - let's bail out the cheaters and float paper money all over the world until the dollar bill sinks lower than the Titanic.

Destruction of personal health - let's expose our kids to cheese pizza loving bears and scary clown hamburger hawkers

Destruction of the world - let's pollute the air and destroy the ozone layer. At least we'll all be looking on the bright side of ultraviolet rays

Trendy

Someone asked me today what is currently the most annoying fashion trend?

To that I must answer....what IS a fashion trend these days? I mean, it seems like everything is just a regurgitation of things from the past. Nothing new under the sun. I saw a picture of Victoria Beckham with shoulder pads. Shoulder pads???? Augh, they looked pretty good on Mildred Pierce…..but Victoria Beckham is no Joan Crawford. She looked like a twig with two dead gerbils stuck to her shoulders. Not the best of looks. But, it was TRENDY.

Fashion trends are one of those unfortunate necessities in life to promote bad taste in the name of commerce. Everybody wants something new, even if it looks like crap. And maybe that’s true of other things in our lives, like relationships. When we start looking for the latest trend, we wind up not only looking like crap, but treating people in kind.

Sometimes you just have to put on a white t-shirt and some blue jeans, and appreciate the simplicity of life. Too much trendy can make you windy.